Tuesday, March 29, 2011

Just a heads up--  I've created a new blog that will serve as a kind of journal, recipe book, and creative playground.  It's called Being Ashling, and feel free to visit whenever you'd like.

http://beingashling.blogspot.com

Monday, March 21, 2011

Title:  Percy Jackson & the Olympians: The Lightning Thief
Format:  Netflix
Genre:  Fantasy
Rating:  C

Synopsis (from Amazon.com):  Modern and mythical worlds collide in this thunderous fantasy-adventure starring Pierce Brosnan, Kevin McKidd and Uma Thurman as you’ve never seen them before! Percy Jackson is no ordinary teenager...he’s just learned he’s the son of Poseidon and is accused of stealing Zeus’ ­lightning bolt – the most powerful weapon ever created! With storm clouds brewing, Percy embarks on an incredible cross-country journey to prove his innocence, recover the bolt and prevent a war amongst the gods that could destroy our world!

 ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~
  
I hate it when they make books I love into movies, because they never get it right.  I think my friend Mary pretty much summed it up when she said that the studio must have put all their energy and money into hiring the A-list actors to play smaller roles, instead of focusing on getting good actors to play the main parts and sticking to the story.

I just don't understand why Hollywood feels the need to take something that is already great the way it is and change it.  The Lightning Thief is such a great book with interesting characters, an intense plot, and a satisfying conclusion.  Then Hollywood gets a hold of the movie rights, hires teenage actors that can't act to save their lives, and completely rewrite an already amazing story.  The whole scene with Hades is completely different from the book; it's so frustrating too, because it wasn't a good change.  It was pointless and uncalled for; the original scene was so much more intense and dramatic.  The movie version is comedic and stupid.  One of these days, the movie studios are going to wake up and realize that they're just alienating people when they make these huge changes to the stories they love.  Maybe if they had stuck to the original storyline and hired good actors, this movie would have been a success, rather than a flop.  C
Title:  Transformers 2: Revenge of the Fallen
Format:  Netflix
Genre:  Sci-fi
Rating:  C

Synopsis (from All Movie Guide):  Two years after saving the world with the Autobots, Sam Witwicky is away at college when an ancient Decepticon named "The Fallen" returns to Earth on a mission of vengeance. With the Allspark destroyed, the Autobots lose all hope of returning to their home planet of Cybertron, and begin working with an elite military known as NEST to hunt down any remaining Decepticons. When National Security Advisor Theodore Galloway wages a heated campaign aimed at exiling the giant robots back into space, head Autobot Optimus Prime agrees to comply with the voice of the people, while warning them of the potential consequences of leaving the planet unprotected. Meanwhile, Sam contends with an overly cocky college roommate, and attempts to remain faithful to Mikaela. Just as Sam begins adjusting to the quirks of campus life, a series of inexplicable visions leaves him convinced that the struggle between good and evil is far from over. And he's correct, too, because the Decepticons have just discovered that Sam is the one human who possesses the ability to tip the balance of power to the Autobots' advantage, and they're determined to gain the upper hand by dispensing with him once and for all. Now, as Sam and Mikaela unearth a secret about the Transformers that alters the entire course of human history, the Decepticon known as The Fallen prepares to return -- and reclaim the plant once and for all.

~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~

Such a huge description for such a stupid film.  In case you couldn't already tell, I really disliked this movie.  Terrible script, bad acting, way too many sexual situations and innuendo, and a plot that seemed extremely similar to the first movie.  I truly felt like I'd wasted two hours of my life after watching this.  Perhaps the two redeeming qualities for the entire movie were the incredible special effects and the intense battle scenes.  The battles were definitely cooler, the new Transformers were creative, and the special effects were spectacular.  But that's all that was good about the movie.

First off, both movies had huge problems with stilted scripts that seemed to come straight out of a comic book.  Lines that came out of nowhere, one-sentence conversations, lots of yelling.  It's no mystery why the acting was so bad when the script was so awful.

Second, I don't care how much the male population loved Megan Fox, but couldn't they find someone who could act?  Several of the other actors were terrible too, but Fox was the worst of all.

Also, why all the smut?  There was plenty in the first movie, but I felt this one had three times as much.  It was uncomfortable to watch, and I almost turned the movie off during the first 30 minutes because I was so sick of the innuendo and the smut.

Finally, I guess there's really no escaping the whole Autobots vs. Decepticons storyline, since that is really what the original cartoons were all about.  But there was so much that felt the same between the two movies.  Both had the desert as a primary battle zone, both had the crazy internet hackers, both had the huge battle over Sam, both had the annoying-as-hell government guys.

This movie just felt like a smuttier retelling of the first, and even though Megan Fox has been ousted from the third, I'm not looking forward to the next installment of the Transformers series, if it'll be anything at all like Revenge of the FallenC
Title:  Aeon Flux
Format:  Netflix
Genre:  Sci-Fi
Rating:  C+

Synopsis (from All Movie Guide):  Based on the animated series by Peter Chung, Aeon Flux imagines a future in which 99 percent of the world's population is killed through industrial disease, and the survivors live in a single city that, despite utopian appearances, is quite totalitarian. Disinclined to embrace any particular ideology outside of a hatred for Trevor Goodchild, the leader of the council that governs the walled city, hyper-sexualized assassin Aeon Flux seeks to bring about a revolution. Retaining the title character's trademark jet-black hair and sleek, revealing clothing, this film adaptation fleshes out the story behind the sexual and romantic tension between Aeon and Trevor.

~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~

Here's a movie that proves you don't need to have a plot to get people to watch.  The whole point of this movie was to showcase Charlize Theron.  Skimpy or skin-tight outfits, constant close-ups on her face, and acrobatic movements are included to focus your attention on Theron's body so you'll never pay attention to the fact that there is almost no story to follow.

The little bit of story that exists is full of holes that never get filled.  From what I've read online, the animated series was pretty much the same.  One thing that they did change for the movie was to make Trevor Goodchild a much younger man, for which I will always be grateful.  Marton Csokas is a great actor, and even though this movie was awful, I have to give him (and Charlize Theron) some credit for still giving a good performance, despite having such a crappy (non-existent) script.  The only reason I'd probably ever watch this movie again is to watch him.   

I was also disappointed in Johnny Lee Miller, who portrayed the villain in this movie.  He's such a phenomenal actor, but I felt like he didn't even try to do a good job with this part.  He was over-the-top in some scenes, while practically monotone in others.  He could've at least put in a little effort, even if he did know that the movie was going to stink.  C+
Title:  17 Again
Format:  Netflix
Genre:  Comedy/Romantic comedy
Rating:  B

Leslie Mann so deserves the credit for making this movie better than average.  She's another one of those great character actors who doesn't seem to get enough acclaim for her roles.  Zac Efron was good too, but the plot's been done enough times that nothing about this movie seemed original or unique.  Maybe the geeky best friend romancing the geeky principal was kind of funny, but overall, the movie was just average.  B
Title:  27 Dresses
Format:  Netflix
Genre:  Romantic comedy
Rating:  B

Typical romantic comedy.  Katherine Heigl and James Marsden are funny, but they're characters have so little development that they're practically two-dimensional.  Heigl's co-star Judy Greer, who never gets the acclaim she deserves, steals every scene.  I would have preferred watching a whole movie about her character, rather than sit through another hackneyed, cliched story.  B
Title:  When In Rome
Format:  Netflix
Genre:  Romantic comedy
Rating:  B+

Another typical rom-com.  Full of embarrassing scenarios to make you cringe, over-the-top and unrealistic characters, and an extremely ridiculous plot line, When In Rome is no different than any other modern romantic comedy.  I really love Josh Duhamel and Kristen Bell, but they desperately need to get out of the rom-com rut, or they will never get out.  B+

Tuesday, March 15, 2011

Title:  Win a Date with Tad Hamilton!
Format:  Netflix
Genre:  Romantic Comedy
Rating:  A-

Synopsis (from All Movie Guide):  Famous Hollywood actor Tad Hamilton is trying to promote his new movie. His manager and his agent both convince him to participate in a dating contest in order to improve his bad-boy image. The contest is won by Rosalee Futch, an attractive young checkout girl who works at a Piggly Wiggly in West Virginia. When Tad ends up falling in love with her, he's willing to give up big-city life and move to small-town America. Meanwhile, her best friend and co-worker Pete is finally motivated to reveal his secret crush on her. Rosalee finds herself in the middle of a love triangle between her closest friend and a dream date.

~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~

I am honestly sick of writing about romantic comedies, and I still have around five more to review.  What else can be said about them that hasn't already been said?  Boy likes Girl; Girl likes other Guy; other Guy turns out to be not-so-great; Girl realizes Boy was right for her the whole time.  The only things that set this movie apart from all other rom-coms were Ginnifer Goodwin's role as best friend and her one-liners (hilarious!), and Nathan Lane as Duhamel's agent.  His role in the movie is small but memorable.  (And then there's the fact that Josh Duhamel's gorgeous).  Otherwise, Win a Date with Tad Hamilton is your standard rom-com.  A-
Title:  The Snow Queen
Format:  Netflix
Genre:  Fantasy/Miniseries
Rating:  B-

Synopsis (from All Movie Guide):  This lavish adaptation of Hans Christian Andersen's The Snow Queen stars Bridget Fonda as the icy-hearted title character. Arriving incognito at the alpine inn run by a man named Wolfgang, the embittered Snow Queen makes it her mission in life to ruin all chances of romance for Wolfgang's beautiful daughter, Gerda. To this end, the Queen exercises her magic over Gerda's bellhop boyfriend Kai, literally freezing the boy in his tracks. In order to save her beloved, Gerda must undertake a grueling odyssey through the Four Seasons (each of them briefly appearing in human form), culminating in a final, frigid showdown with the spiteful Snow Queen.

~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~

A lavish adaptation with mediocre actors and a stilted script.  Yes, the settings were beautiful, and the special effects were of higher quality than I'd expected.  But the actors were either stiff and emotionless, almost speaking in monotone, or over-the-top and practically screaming to get their emotions across.  There was also an extreme lack of chemistry between the two main characters.  Their romance seemed so forced.  And then there was this weird thing about the devil and a mirror that just came out of nowhere.

The best parts were the interpretations of the seasons.  Spring is a sweet, motherly woman who lives in a cottage covered in flowers, where she tries to keep Gerda young and childish.  Summer is a sultry Indian princess, living in a palace.  She attempts to find a new lover for Gerda, since summer is the season for romance and passion.  After escaping into fall's territory, Gerda discovers that Autumn is a red-headed gypsy woman who leads a band of cutthroats who party and throw bonfires to try to keep back winter's chill.  And then of course, there's the Snow Queen.  Beautiful but cold, she resides in a manor of ice and looks for a way to be rid of the other seasons.  These portrayals of the seasons were creative and fun, and without them, the miniseries would have been a lot worse.

Not spectacular or high-quality, but worth at least one watch.  B-
Title:  Reaper Man
Author:  Terry Pratchett
Format:  Paperback
Pages:  384
Genre:  Fantasy/Satire
Read: 2010

Rating:  A

Synopsis (from publisher): They say there are only two things you can count on ... 

But that was before DEATH started pondering the existential. Of course, the last thing anyone needs is a squeamish Grim Reaper and soon his Discworld bosses have sent him off with best wishes and a well-earned gold watch. Now DEATH is having the time of his life, finding greener pastures where he can put his scythe to a whole new use.

But like every cutback in an important public service, DEATH's demise soon leads to chaos and unrest -- literally, for those whose time was supposed to be up, like Windle Poons. The oldest geezer in the entire faculty of Unseen University -- home of magic, wizardry, and big dinners -- Windle was looking forward to a wonderful afterlife, not this boring been-there-done-that routine. To get the fresh start he deserves, Windle and the rest of Ankh-Morpork's undead and underemployed set off to find DEATH and save the world for the living (and everybody else, of course).

~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~

Possibly the best Discworld book I've read thus far.  I think it's mostly because DEATH is the best character ever.  I know that sounds weird, but he really is hilarious.  And DEATH developing a conscience and getting fired is a great story idea.  

The other half of the story is really good too.  Windle Poons and his undead friends are so amusing as they try to navigate "life" after... well, what should have been death.  They're adventures with the "birth" of the modern shopping mall is one of the funniest satires I have ever read.  

Pratchett really outdid himself with Reaper Man.  I cannot wait to read it again.  A
Title:  I Shall Wear Midnight
Author:  Terry Pratchett
Format:  Hardcover
Pages:  355
Genre:  Fantasy/Young Adult
Series #:  4 of 4
Read:  2010

Rating:  A-

Synopsis (from publisher):  It starts with whispers.  Then someone picks up a stone.  Finally, the fires begin.  When people turn on witches, the innocents suffer. . . .

Tiffany Aching has spent years studying with senior witches, and now she is on her own. As the witch of the Chalk, she performs the bits of witchcraft that aren't sparkly, aren't fun, don't involve any kind of wand, and that people seldom ever hear about: She does the unglamorous work of caring for the needy.

But someone or something is igniting fear, inculcating dark thoughts and angry murmurs against witches. Aided by her tiny blue allies, the Wee Free Men, Tiffany must find the source of this unrest and defeat the evil at its root before it takes her life. Because if Tiffany falls, the whole Chalk falls with her.

~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~

The fourth book of the Tiffany Aching series, I Shall Wear Midnight, is an exciting story that grips you and keeps you reading.  Opening with an intense and heart-rending scene, the book immediately sets you up for the drama to follow.  Tiffany's foe here is perhaps the creepiest of any she's ever had to face, especially since he's infecting the thoughts of the people around him.

I loved this installment because of the romance element.  In the three previous books, Tiffany was too young for any real romance.  Now that she's older, she's ready for love, but not with the person we all believed she would end up marrying.  Instead, Roland is to marry someone else, and Tiffany must deal with the heartbreak and jealousy.

I Shall Wear Midnight isn't my favorite of the series, but it's a close second.  A-
Title:  Avatar
Format:  Netflix
Genre:  Sci-Fi
Rating:  A-

I don't know why I'm bothering to put a description.  I think the entire world has heard of this movie at some point.

Description (from imdb.com):  When his brother is killed in a robbery, paraplegic Marine Jake Sully decides to take his place in a mission on the distant world of Pandora. There he learns of greedy corporate figurehead Parker Selfridge's intentions of driving off the native humanoid "Na'vi" in order to mine for the precious material scattered throughout their rich woodland. In exchange for the spinal surgery that will fix his legs, Jake gathers intel for the cooperating military unit spearheaded by gung-ho Colonel Quaritch, while simultaneously attempting to infiltrate the Na'vi people with the use of an "avatar" identity. While Jake begins to bond with the native tribe and quickly falls in love with the beautiful alien Neytiri, the restless Colonel moves forward with his ruthless extermination tactics, forcing the soldier to take a stand - and fight back in an epic battle for the fate of Pandora.

~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~

I admit it.  I finally caved and saw Avatar.  And to all of you people who don't believe Avatar is anything like Pocahontas... you're wrong.  This movie is a futuristic Pocahontas with aliens.  That doesn't mean it's not a great movie; while the plot line is pretty much the same, everything else--the settings, characters, genre, and format--  is so radically different that Avatar is still a creative and original idea with amazing special effects.  And comparing it to Pocahontas shouldn't be seen as an insult anyway, since I think that movie was pretty awesome too.

My favorite part of the whole movie was the world James Cameron created.  Pandora is beautiful, and its inhabitants are fun and colorful.  The attention to detail and color, the unique creatures, and the amazing special effects worked together to create a new world which Cameron will be basing another two movies in at least.

Avatar is definitely a great movie, worthy of watching more than once, but maybe not worth the extreme mania that surrounded it.  I know several people who think it's "the greatest movie ever," and while I agree it's great, I don't agree that it's the "greatest."  A-

Thursday, March 3, 2011

Title:  Wintersmith
Author:  Terry Practhett
Format:  Hardcover
Pages:  336
Genre:  Fantasy/Young adult
Series #:  3 of 4
Read in:  2010

Rating:  A-

Synopsis (from the publisher):  At 9, Tiffany Aching defeated the cruel Queen of Fairyland. At 11, she banished an ancient body-stealing evil. At 13, Tiffany faces a new challenge: a boy. And boys can be a bit of a problem when you're thirteen . . . .

But the Wintersmith isn't exactly a boy. He is Winter itself—snow, gales, icicles—all of it. When he has a crush on Tiffany, he may make her roses of ice, but his nature is blizzards and avalanches. And he wants Tiffany to stay in his gleaming, frozen world. Forever.

Tiffany will need all her cunning to make it to Spring. She'll also need her friends, from junior witches to the legendary Granny Weatherwax. They—Crivens! Tiffany will need the Wee Free Men, too! She'll have the help of the bravest, toughest, smelliest pixies ever to be banished from Fairyland—whether she wants it or not. It's going to be a cold, cold season, because if Tiffany doesn't survive until Spring—Spring won't come.

~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~

I wish I'd reviewed this book as soon as I read it, so I could actually remember all the reasons I liked this book.  But alas, I did not; therefore, this will be a short review.  I think Wintersmith is probably my favorite of the Tiffany Aching series.  The story was exciting and the Mac Feegles were their usual hilarious, troublesome selves.  Tiffany was also a more enjoyable character, easier to relate to and understand.  The Wintersmith presented a formidable adversary, and yet you can't help but pity him.  The other witches were great secondary characters with a lot of depth and humor.  A fun read.  A-
Title:  The Lady in the Palazzo
Author:  Marlena de Blasi
Format:  Paperback
Pages:  317
Genre:  Memoir/Travelogue
Read:  2010

Rating:  B+

Synopsis (from the publisher):  Orvieto, an ancient Italian city rising above the cliffs of Umbria, is among the most dramatic in Europe. It is here that Marlena de Blasi, author of the national bestseller A Thousand Days in Venice, sets out to make a home—in the former ballroom of a dilapidated sixteenth-century palazzo—and win over her neighbors, who include artisans, counts, shepherds, and a lone violinist. Though wary of a stranger in their midst, they find her passion for the fine arts of cooking and eating irresistible, and together they create a spectacular feast as breathtaking as the city itself.

~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~

Better than That Summer in Sicily, but still not as good as A Thousand Days in Tuscany.  This addition to de Blasi's memoirs is full of interesting characters, fun anecdotes, and great descriptions.  But for me, it lacked the passion of her first two books.  I just didn't connect with her or her new neighbors the way I did in A Thousand Days.  It was still a good book, but I found myself skimming through parts of it.  Maybe it's partly because I've never bought a home that needed renovations, which is why those parts of the book seemed tedious (just like Under the Tuscan Sun).  I think the biggest reason I struggled to enjoy this book was because de Blasi herself struggled with her inclusive neighbors and lazy Italian contractors, and that struggle came through in her writing.  A great picture of Tuscan culture, but not as appealing as de Blasi's other works.  B+